Guest Blog by author and soon to be mummy via surrogacy, Bianca Smith.
It has been nearly 40 years since the world’s first “test tube” baby and technology in the fertility field has advanced big time, with a 30% increase in success rates since then. However, as much as science has advanced, there is still that percentage of unexplained coupes who don’t have success no matter what procedures they adopt, what meds they inject or how many times they try.
For most couples, this is the end of the road – the end of their dreams to create a family of their own. But it doesn’t need to be. There are many options available for open-minded couples to become parents despite their fertility challenges. I’m going to discuss the two options that I followed; Egg Donation and Surrogacy.
Both these routes to becoming a parent has been socially frowned upon, although Egg Donation is gaining in popularity amongst the fertility challenged folk. This is when the eggs of a second woman are harvested via IVF (invitro fertilization) and transferred to the woman who wishes to be pregnant. So, the child will not be genetically related to the woman carrying it, but through the capabilities of epigenetics can still pass on her own characteristics to the child in her womb. Legalities surrounding Egg Donation changes per country, with some countries only allowing anonymous donors and other countries allowing the children to look up their egg donors when they reach a certain age.
Then there’s Surrogacy – with or without Donor Eggs. This is simply when another woman carries a baby for the couple who wishes to be parents. Traditional Surrogacy means that the woman who will carry the baby gives her own eggs to be joined with the male partner’s sperm (or donor sperm). This type of surrogacy is being replaced by Gestational Surrogacy, which means that eggs will come from either the intended mother or by an Egg Donor and then implanted into the womb of the woman who will carry the baby for the couple. The idea here is that because the surrogate has no genetic link to the baby she is carrying, she will be less likely to want to keep the baby. Of course, that’s not always true and sadly, there have been intended parents who have been left with broken hearts and empty arms when a surrogate has decided to the keep the child.
After many years of fertility challenges, miscarriage, 8 failed IVF cycles, needles, pills, drips, nasal sprays, specific diets, operations, money spent and tears cried – it would be the most devestating thing we can imagine, to be so close to having our family and then our surrogate changes her mind!
Fortunately, through doing our research, my husband and I found a clinic in Ukraine where this sort of thing would never happen. Why? Because in Ukraine, the laws protect the intended parents and are in fact the most favorable surrogacy laws in the world. The intended parents are immediately recognized as the baby’s parents, their names are put onto the birth certificate and the surrogate has no right to keep the baby. And now, with our surrogate 31 weeks pregnant with our twin boys, we are more than smiling! We are jumping up and down, we are crying tears of joy, we are dancing all the way through to August when they are due, we are buying cribs, reading baby books and practicing those nappy changes! For the first time since trying to conceive, we are finally seeing our parenthood dreams materializing right in front of us!
There has been so much controversy surrounding Surrogacy over the years. Even today, when people should be broader minded and accepting, intended parents who wish to follow the surrogacy path, still feel stigmatized and victimized. As a result, there are the couples who skip over the idea of surrogacy altogether, but who would have chosen this option if there was no fear of judgement from others in their social circles, and there’s the couples who still decide to do surrogacy but keep it on the down-low – extreme down-low. I have a closed Facebook group for anyone interested in the surrogacy process. Closed, will mean that your friends will be able to see that you are part of the group, but won’t be able to see any posts or comments. This group is a global mix of intended parents either already undergoing or considering surrogacy in various countries – UK, USA, Ukraine, Russia and others, as well as veteran and new surrogates. Please feel free to send me a membership request at the following link Where’s My Stork? – All About SURROGACY.
In addition to the above group, I have also recently started a secret Facebook group for all those intended parents interested in surrogacy. Secret meaning, membership is via invitation only. No one will be able to see who is in this group, but not only that, no one will know that this group even exists. It is purely for intended parents (no surrogates or service providers).
If you are interested in finding out more about my Surrogacy journey, about Surrogacy in Ukraine and about how to start your Surrogacy journey, then please visit the following links and/or contact for a chat me via email, text, Whatsapp, phone, Facetime or Facebook. I would love to answer your questions and help you to get on the same happy and stress-free path toward creating your dream family as me.
Main Website: www.wheresmystork.com
My Surrogacy Story: http://www.wheresmystork.com/my-surrogacy-story
Where’s My Stork? – All About SURROGACY: https://www.facebook.com/groups/parentsthrusurrogacy/
Email: firstname.lastname@example.org OR email@example.com
Tel: +1 813-454-5148
Bianca has been running her blog, Where’s My Stork since March 2015, in which she has documented her fertility journey 8 failed IVF cycles, missed-miscarriage, egg donation, fertility treatment in the UK as well as Czech Republic and her surrogacy journey in Ukraine. Her blog also features many guest bloggers and interviews with inspirational women and service providers in the fertility field.
Her book, IVF A Detailed Guide, self-published on Amazon in July 2016, is filled with pages of information that she researched and collected during her years of fertility treatments and provide valuable information for all those going through IVF whether at the research stage, beginning or middle of their journeys. IVF A Detailed Guide is available in eBook, Paperback and Audio.
Bianca now has gorgeous twin boys via Egg Donation Surrogacy in Ukraine and they are certainly keeping her busy!